Posted by: ubahleeob | March 24, 2009

Some Things Just Are…

adam-drummingOver the last four days I have been immersed in the world of indoor  drum and percussion lines. Drummers and dancers, drummers being dancers (some of it made me think about the Sobe commercials with the football players doing ballet—-big guys with bass drums doing twirls and turns).   It is the “Sport Of The Arts” (as they say).  They are timed, they are judged .  They practice and practice and practice.  They run, they do push ups.  It’s insane.   As a drummer myself,  it was wonderful!! Especially seeing my youngest out there doing things with sticks and heads I have only dreamt of.  And isn’t it  cool how talents and tastes are passed on from one generation to the next.  Some might say that the reason he drums is because I drummed. There has always been music at our house (loud if Phyllis wasn’t around), and  for the majority of his life he has seen me drumming. Some would say that is why he is becoming a drumming master (said his dad).

 I disagree, it is something else. Something deeper and more important.  

My father could fix anything. I saw him take a dryer that should have been put out of it’s misery 5 years earlier and when it looked to be headed to the Great Kenmore Store in the sky he somehow nursed it back to life.  He could take wood and make beautiful cabinets or bookcases.  I was around him and  I still can’t be trusted with nails and hammer, let alone power tools.  Some things you can’t teach, some things just “are” .  But why?  

For me that is an easy answer, it’s part of the plan.  As the Creator of All sat back, looking at the tapestry where he would paint “human history” he thought, this part needs a ….. drummer or a singer or a mechanic or a mom or ……… Some things can be learned, but some things just are.  

My other son is songwriter, singer and guitar player.  I love to write, and somewhere there are tapes and records of me singing in school and college choirs.  Again, he is not interested in cars or doing manual labor (definitely got that from me), he wants to write and sing.  We never forced them to do any of this.  There were no obligatory piano  or voice lessons.  Some things just are.

My wife, the aformentioned Phyllis, is a teacher.  She has taught special education kids, she has taught military kids, she has taught in public  and private schools.  She will tell you teaching is her passion, that thing that she has to do.  To her it is a calling.  Recently the school where she has been teaching for 3 years decided not to renew her contract.  The reasons are not important, suffice it to say, she was dealt with unfairly.  But unfairness happens to us all. She has struggled. She has cried. She has doubted.  She has questioned this thing she always assumed was her calling.  None of this is wrong, all of it is normal.  

Yet the ultimate answer  for her, and the rest of us, remains the same, some things cannot be taught — they just are.  In my wife’s case, sure, there are schools that award teaching degrees.   But that love of learning, that patience that true teachers possess, that ability to take elephant size concepts and break them down into easily digestible pieces —   you can’t learn that, it just “is”. Her current position will be ending,  perhaps God decided another part of the painting needed more “teacher”.  We don’t really get to choose how we are being  used, only the Creator has the perspective of space and time to know when and  where our uniqueness is needed.   

So next weekend we get to do it all again.  Another drumline  competition. More twirling and dancing drummers.  I can’t wait to see it, the legacy that I am leaving behind, passed  to me by my mom who loved to sing and my  guitar playing grandfather.  It is too wonderful and difficult to figure out.

Some things just are.





  1. […] . She appointed a committee which found dozens of special education teachers were let-go without Some Things Just Are… – 03/24/2009 Over the last four days I have been immersed in the world of […]

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